Does a confident mom raise confident children? I think so. When I first saw the title of this article, Do Insecure Moms Raise Insecure Children, my first thought was yes. How can you not? If you are constantly swimming in a sea of self-doubt, negative thoughts, and insecurities, your children will pick up on it. It’s the power of osmosis and it works…all too well. I have always projected a confident image. I don’t make excuses, I don’t give apologies, and I don’t spend time pondering what life could be like. I make decisions, choose my path, then journey forth. What I never really thought about, until I read this article, was what impact my confidence level has had on the confidence levels of my children.
My kids have always been popular. They are outgoing, make friends easily, and don’t seem to sweat the small stuff. They walk with their heads held high and are almost always in control of any given situation (i.e. at the playground telling the other kids what their role is in the game they’ve made up and are directing). I asked my 15-year-old son and 10-year-old daughter what they thought about their confidence levels. After explaining what confidence means and what insecurity is, they both agreed that – while we all face a certain level of insecurity in our everyday lives – they are far more confident than they are insecure.
After I re-read the article, I realized that I can relate to this mom; more than I’d ever care to admit to myself or anyone else. I’m a working mother. I’m away from my home for 12 hours a day, 4 days a week. The 1 day a week that I telework, I am still unavailable for 8 hours while I attend conference calls, work on projects, and complete the tasks that are necessary to accomplish the end-results. I miss events, I struggle to keep up with my kids’ social and activity calendars, and we eat out way more often than we eat at home. And while this is not my ideal way to raise my kids, it is the best that I can do as a single/co-parent. I cannot choose whether to work, I have to. I cannot choose whether to be here or there, I cannot stay home.
No matter if you work outside of the home or are a stay at home mom, it is important to be confident – even when you feel like you aren’t. Your confidence is a key part to your ability to raise confident children who hold their heads high and are proud of themselves. Without this element, kids are susceptible to bullying and other negative influences that will be around them at school and in other environments during their lives. So, push your insecurities aside and walk the confident talk; always do your best and be that example of confidence for your children.
I want to hear from you!
What do you think about the impact your confidence level has on the confidence level of your children? Please leave me a comment below and let’s have a discussion.