rant story I just want to vent a little. Before I get into it, here’s a little history. I’m a working mom. I have worked full-time since I was 19 years old. Currently, I work as an analyst in the Federal Government. I commute 2-3 days a week to Downtown Washington, DC which takes me away from my home for 12 hours of the day (5 am to 5 pm).
On 12/12/12 (I just love that date!) I started a consulting business. No, I did not quit my full-time job. I consult in my personal/off time. In January of this year, I started writing and then I started this blog. What’s important to note in all of this is that I am also raising three children as a single co-parent (i.e. I am no longer married but their father is involved).
This brings me to my title: unapologetic working mother.
What annoys me about parenting in general is the way the moms who think they’ve figured out the magic parenting formula throw around their opinions as though they are the author of the non-existent parenting handbook. There is no such thing. Every parent has to do what works for them. I don’t have any problem with mothers who choose not to work outside of the home, or at all. What I do have a problem with are mothers who act like they are a better mom than me because of their choice to stay-at-home.
Now, I would be straight up lying if I said there weren’t days that I wish I could be around more, which is why I’m working on growing my brand. But if I’m being completely honest, there is no land on earth or in the heavens where my idea of the perfect life is staying at home all day and caring for my children. There, I said it. That’s right. I don’t want to. I LOVE those three little monsters with all that I am but the thought of them being my only job makes me wanna run for the hills. Some days the office feels like a vacation since I get a break from mom duty. I need my work. I want to be more than a mom. I want to do it all. I can and will do it all.
More mommyhood history.
I stayed home with my first son until he was two years old, and I was able to work part-time while taking my daughter into the office with me for her first three months. With my youngest, I had just started a new job and took leave without pay so I was only home with him for four weeks – but my mother had just retired *jackpot* so she took care of him the first year. The same daycare provider cared for all three of my kids, and she also cared for my younger sister. She was the best. And more like family than anything else. So, leaving my children in her care was not exactly a gut-wrenching experience. It was a joy. They loved her. She loved them. They looked forward to going to her home every day, and I looked forward to going to work. It was a win-win.
My kids have always been happy, healthy, and 100% sure of how much I love them. Every day I make sure they know what they mean to me; whether I am kissing them in their sleepy states as I leave for work in the early morning, asking them how their days were when I pick them up, or hanging out having a good laugh with them.
Do they wish I was home more? Sure they do. When they are enjoying our home, participating in activities, and going on vacations, do they appreciate that I work? Yup, they really do.
So-long-story-short, or long-as-it-is, I love my work. It’s a part of who I am and a huge reason why I’m able to be an effective mother; because I’m able to pursue my passion and purpose which gives me fulfillment. Because being a good mother doesn’t equal giving up the other things that make us happy. I’m an unapologetic working mom. Sure, I want to be around more – and that is what I am working towards by building my business and brand. But at the end of the day, going to work is a small sacrifice for something that makes me a better person, and mom, in the end.
I want to hear from you!
Are you happy with your choice – to either stay/work-at-home or have a career outside of the home? Please leave me a comment below and let’s have a discussion.